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Maybe It's Time To Pull The Plug?

THE TIMES OF INDIA

 

 

Chandigarh

The police will now protect cows in Punjab.

The Punjab Government has announced that a cow protection cell will be set up in the office of the Director General of Police.

An official here issued a statement on Sunday, September 19, 2010 that the cell will be manned by an officer not below the rank of Inspector General.

He said the cell had been entrusted with the task of implementing rules and regulations already in force.

 

In case you are wondering why the cow is so important and why it needs protection, here's an essay that explains it all. It was submitted for an IAS exam (True - Cross my heart and hope to die!) -

 

He is the cow. The cow is a successful animal. Also he is 4 footed, and because he is female, he gives milks. He is same like God, sacred to Hindus and useful to man. But he has got four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards. His whole body can be utilised for use. More so the milk. Milk comes from 4 taps attached to his basement.

* * * * *

What can it do? Various ghee, butter, cream, curd, why and the condensed milk and so forth. And he is also useful to cobbler, watermans and mankind generally. His motion is slow only because he is of lazy species, and also his gober [dung] is much useful to farmers, plants and trees and is used to make flat cakes, in hand and drying sun.

* * * * *

Cow is the only animal that extricates after eating. Then afterwards she chew with his teeth whom are situated in the inside of the mouth. He is incessantly in the meadows in the grass. His only attacking and defending organ is the horns, specially so when he is got child. This is done by knowing his head whereby he causes the weapond to be parralleled to the ground of the earth and instantly proceed with great velocity forewards. He has got tails also, situated in the backyard, but not like similar animals. It has hairs on the other end of the other side. This is done to frighten away the flies which alight on his cohesive body hereupon he gives hit with it.

* * * * *

The palms of his feet are soft onto the touch. So the grasses head is not crushed. At night time have poses by looking down on the ground and he shouts. His eyes and nose are like his other relatives. This is the cow ...

 

 

September 20, 2010

Conversation about this article

1: Jairaj Kumar Seetal (New Delhi, India), September 20, 2010, 8:29 AM.

And who will protect the holy rat - the sacred "ride" of Ganesh? Or is it a mouse? Whatever ... please protect them all. P-L-E-A-S-E!

2: Rakesh Duggal (Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh, India), September 20, 2010, 8:32 AM.

What I have to say about this is not very nice ... so, I won't!

3: Ranjit Kaur (New York, U.S.A.), September 20, 2010, 8:36 AM.

Makes perfect sense to me. You see, if you add 2 and 2, you have to end up with 4. If you're looking at India, what else do you expect. Andher nagri ... The land of bufoons!

4: N. Singh (Canada), September 20, 2010, 9:26 AM.

In the West, the police are employed to 'protect and serve' the people, and in India they are employed to 'kill, maim, rape and harass' the public but protect cows! Let us all make a toast with a glass of 'cow urine' to secular India and its Hindu government! Jai Hind!

5: Sangat Singh (Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia), September 20, 2010, 4:35 PM.

Since the cow is worthy of reverence, you have to give equal respect to the bull to provide mechanism for the perpetuity of its tribe. One couldn't exist without the other. Since I could not keep away from this humourous fray, and at same time mindful of walking on thin ice of propriety, may I transfer the blame to J. K. Galbraith, erstwhile U.S. Ambassador to India during the Kennedy era, for this story, who was known for his fatal fluency with words: "It was summer and I was deeply in love. One day the object of my love, a compact, golden-haired girl who lived on Willey's Side road, a half mile away, came over to visit my sisters. They were away and we walked together through the orchard and climbed onto a rail fence which overlooked a small field between our place and Bert McCallum's. Our cows were pasturing on the second-growth clover in front of us. The hot summer afternoon lay quiet all around. With the cows was a white bull named O.A.C Pride, for the Ontario Agricultural College (Guelph, Canada) where my father had bid for him in at an auction. As we perched there, the bull served his purpose by serving a heifer which was in season. Noticing that my companion was watching with evident interest, and with some sense of my own courage, I said: "I think it would be fun to do that." She replied: "Well, it's your cow!"

6: Raj (Canada), September 20, 2010, 8:22 PM.

The cow is the favourite ride of Shiva, mice for Ganesha and the monkey is god himself. Question: how do they pimp their ride? I won't even start on the lingam. Then there're the oft-used Hindu last names like sunderlingham, shivalingham and many more. Anyone need a translation? Certainly, from the land of bufoons ...

7: R. Singh (Canada), September 22, 2010, 7:15 PM.

What ingrates! The buffalo provides most of the milk and her offspring, the bull, is mercilessly slaughtered as "mahisur demon"! Since the police guard is ready, why not appoint the cow the governor of the place!

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