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What I Learnt From Angels

DIPA KAUR

 

 

 



Do we believe in angels? Especially those one meets out of the blue?

I have met a few recently during my travels abroad, and they have restored my faith in humanity.

My sister Simran, my 19-year old niece, my 9-year old daughter and I embarked on a 10 days’ girls’ trip to London and Paris over this past holiday season.

Traveling opens your hearts and minds, you discover the unknown and you learn so much. For us, as I said, it restored our faith in the human race …

LESSON I

Strangers who help you without asking for anything in return. No payment, no return favours, no quid pro quo, nothing -- just human kindness. Here are five stories about angels we encountered during the 10-day trip.

1   London: A kind doorman at an established upmarket swanky hotel in London who allowed my niece and daughter to use the bathroom as all shops were closed on Christmas day in London. No judgement, no questions, no prejudice. Not once asking us if we were guests of the hotel. All he saw was two young (uncomfortable) girls, pleasantly greeted them and said “Of course!” and gladly showed them the way to the bathroom.

2   Paris: My 9-year old daughter sustained a bad fall in Paris - a huge bleeding gash needing stitches and medical attention. Despite language breakdowns and confusion, we had people helping us call for a taxi to the hospital and showing us the way.

3   Paris - Robert Debre Children’s Hospital: The medical and attending staff at the hospital. Patient, gentle and treating each child like the most special child in the world … with 110% professional attention (despite a bursting waiting room late in the evening). My daughter needed 11 stitches on her knee. The clearly overworked and exhausted attending doctor made her comfortable, patiently chatted with her, put on her favourite music, taking all the time needed for his terrified 9-year old patient to settle before embarking on the treatment.

4   Paris, Hospital to Hotel: The taxi driver who fetched us from the hospital back to the hotel. He took time helping my daughter in and out of the taxis (space was tight with four passengers), gentle with her like precious cargo, put on music and tried his best to make the hour-long taxi ride as comfortable as possible. En route, he also showed us the sights in Paris. During the course of the ride, we discovered common favourite musical artists. The driver was so into the moment that he missed the turning to our hotel. He switched off the meter, apologised profusely and told us that he would not charge us as it was his fault. (We tipped him well, nevertheless.)

London to Dubai -- On the 7-hour aeroplane journey halfway home: Two young gentlemen (teenagers) who swapped their seats right in the front row of the plane -- premium, roomy seats -- with two strangers, my daughter and I. We had cramped up seats right at the back of the plane (it was an incredibly full flight) and my daughter could not bend her leg.

These 2 young men, about 16-18 years old, gave up their comfortable seats for the smaller, uncomfortable seats, for a 7-hour plane journey. When I thanked them during the quick swap (the plane was about to take off), they just said “No worries!” and gave us the biggest smiles you could imagine, as if it was no big deal. Nothing asked in return, just two extremely kind gentlemen who helped two strangers.

It was a huge deal to us. I never got a chance to meet them again to thank them, as my daughter needed constant attention throughout the flight. I hope they get my thank-you note whoever and wherever they are (I sent the note to the airline). Bless them and their parents who did a brilliant job in bringing up these fine young gentlemen.

LESSON II

You encounter unpleasant people who are fighting battles of their own and who do not care about anything or anyone. Rude waitresses, service staff who yell at you for not understanding their language or how the train system works in Paris. We just need a bit of time to understand, that’s why we need to ask. This taught us to be tolerant with others.

LESSON III

Aapney loge (’your own people’): You meet fellow Sikhs and Punjabis or others from the subcontinent who are earning a living in a foreign land, peddling goods (in our case, by the Eiffel Tower), and make a connection over a brief transaction.

We met some young men from Punjab peddling miniature Eiffel Towers. Like family, they were giving us free gifts after one purchase and gathered around us to speak in Punjabi. We instantly became ‘bhen ji’ (sister) to them and they even offered to take us to the Paris Gurdwara.

Sweet connection. People are people, good people, no matter where we are.

P.S There is a 6th angel.

This is story # 6 to be added to "Lesson I” above.

Did I mention my sister Simran who is an anaesthetist and one of the most caring doctors and persons I know?

Dr Simran did not let go of my daughter’s hand during the 2-hour medical treatment / procedure while discreetly checking her pulse, vital signs and overseeing the anaesthesia administered during the treatment.

My niece commented to me on the way back (Paris - London) when Dr Simran and I were sharing food and swapping food items which we each liked and didn’t like: “Maasi (aunt), I have never seen sisters who care for each other this much!”

You are right, Apu, there is nothing that we sisters will not do for each other.

 

[The author is the youngest daughter of Sardar Sangat Singh, who himself is an angel who hovers around sikhchic.com at all times. He is blessed with four daughters. Simran is his second.]

January 3, 2013

Conversation about this article

1: Chintan Singh (San Jose, California, USA), January 03, 2014, 12:03 PM.

Like father, like daughters. The author and her sister ought to be nothing but angels themselves because of their dad's love and deep connection with the shabad Guru. He inspires us daily with his comments and translations of gurbani here on sikhchic.com.

2: Baldev Singh (Bradford, United Kingdom), January 03, 2014, 4:06 PM.

As a lowly Sikh man given the honour of being included as a fairly regular, humble commentator on sikhchic.com, this article shows me the humanity my Guru Nanak tells me about daily! I too have encountered the "angels" talked about and praised here in an extremely moving manner. Ultimately, we are all but Guru Nanak's "One race from One Creator!"

3: Vimal (Seremban. Negeri Sembilan, Malaysia), January 03, 2014, 7:43 PM.

Brilliant, Dipa. A very heart-warming write-up. To me honesty and kindness are the two true meanings of divine worship. Just yesterday a Chinese lady in the ward came and hugged and thanked me for saving her child's life six years ago which I vividly remember. She was so overwhelmed ...

4: Simran Grewal (Dunedin, New Zealand), January 03, 2014, 11:43 PM.

It is so lovely to read this beautiful, heartwarming article written by my amazing maasi (who is also an amazing inspiration and role model to all of us). It is really incredible to see that there is still good people out there despite the high amount of crime and horrible wars seen in the news.

5: Simran Gupta (Kolkata, West Bengal, India ), January 04, 2014, 12:19 AM.

So beautifully written, Dipa. Reading this brought tears to my eyes. Traveling is an eye opener. The doorman was a Christian, our taxi driver was an Algerian Muslim, our brothers at the Eiffel Tower Punjabis. In the end we are all the same, from the same "noor" ... "aval allah noor upayaya kudrat ke sabh bandhay / ek noor te sabh jugg upajaya kaun bhalay kaun manday"?

6: Manpreet Singh (Hyderabad, India), January 04, 2014, 7:40 AM.

No angels in India :)

7: Harcharan Singh (Gastonia, North Carolina, USA), January 04, 2014, 8:50 AM.

"Khud hi ko kar buland itnaa / ke har takdeer ke pahale / khuda bandey se khud puchhey / bataa teri reza kya hai ..."

8: Sushma Prabhu (India), January 04, 2014, 9:20 AM.

Lovely article. I can see that the trait of finding something good in every one runs in the family. Love to you and your folks, wish there were more like you!

9: Jagjeet Singh (Petaling Jaya/ Malaysia), January 04, 2014, 11:55 AM.

An extremely interesting and honest account, Dipa. Your article on "angels" makes me reminisce on an angel I met some 30 years ago in Brisbane en route to the airport to return to Malaysia disappointed as my mission to get my elder son into a boarding Grammar School in Brisbane had proved futile. You see, I had flown all the way to Brisbane to look for an A-level good boarding school in Brisbane. I stayed in youth hostels and moved from school to school ... was even told to try the outskirts. I finally decided to try amongst the best boarding Lutheran grammar schools but after trudging a long way uphill, the woman administrator said one had to reserve a seat in the Grammar Schools in Australia when the infant was still in the mother's womb. This was shocking to me. Let alone getting a place for my son in this Brisbane grammar school, which was my last hope, I was not even given a chance to speak with the principal despite my saying I had travelled to all the boarding schools in and out of Brisbane and had travelled all the way from Malaysia. I sat adamant for two hours hoping he would come out of his room and see me and take compassion on me. No ... I finally left on my own accord after having waited as long as I could endure. Yes, there was an "angel" that is never going to fade out of my memory till I breathe my last for today my son is a dental surgeon because of this angel. It is hard to believe it! As with an extremely heavy heart, I hailed a cab for the airport with my luggage to fly back home, I got into the first cab that came my way. I could hardly speak. As I neared the airport, the North European cab driver asked me why I looked so despondent and I quickly but sadly told him about my last pathetic encounter. He turned off his engine and listening to my story. I had taken out my luggage and had taken out my wallet to pay him for the very long ride. He walked around, held me by the hand and led me back to his cab. "Madam, you are not returning to Malaysia like this with this bad bitter experience. No, it won't happen. Please let me help you. Please get back into the car!" And, to my surprise, he had put back the luggage into his vehicle. I wondered what was happening! "This is ludicrous!" he exclaimed. "I am taking you there and you will see the Reverend. I am a Lutheran and I belong to that church! You are going to meet the Reverend and he is going to give you an ear and a place for your son! You are not going back to Malaysia mission unaccomplished. The least he can do is to interview you about your son and look at his testimonials!" This angel, a migrant, entered the Reverend's office leading me by the hand with the words, "This lady has come from Malaysia to get her son admission into your Pre-Uni class and you didn't even see her! What greater enthusiasm can you find in a mother who is trying to educate her son so far from home! You have to interview her. I belong to your church - Lutheran. This is not the way we treat others. I insist you see her and give her son a place if he rightfully deserves it." The rest is history. My lad - now Dipa's partner in life, my elder son, Ajeet Singh -- became a dental surgeon with the grace of Waheguru and the hand of this angel - a migrant taxi driver - a total stranger. He refused to accept extra payment for all the hours he waited in the school!

10: Ravinder Pal Singh Kalra (Brampton, Ontario, Canada), January 05, 2014, 5:56 PM.

Great experiences and narration, dear Dipa. The Commander of Angels ensures that while they help all, they are certainly present to help their own creed - angels! - under all circumstances.

11: Harbir Grewal (New Zealand), January 05, 2014, 8:05 PM.

We are so proud of you, our little sister, Dipa, for recognizing and acknowledging the angels. It's so beautiful when a kind deed is done without any expectation or any need for praise. May we all learn something from it. Rabb raakha.

12: Harpreet Makkar (Canada), January 06, 2014, 4:20 PM.

Like parents, like daughter. Heart warming narration, Dipa. May God bless all such 'angels' of the world!

13: Simran Grewal (Dunedin, New Zealand), January 06, 2014, 10:33 PM.

#6 Manpreet Singh ji: I thoroughly disagree with your statement. I was born in Auckland, New Zealand and my parents and their family reside in Malaysia. I visited India as a very young child and after seventeen years I have come back to attend a wedding. In the two weeks I've been here, I've never met such loving and caring people. Everyone here has been welcoming us with a warm heart and of course amazing food. I've never felt so at home so far from home and I believe this is an amazing country with great people. I hope in the future you bump into some of the 'angels' we have experienced in these last two weeks. P.S. The sixth angel resides in Calcutta, India too :)

14: Sangat Singh (Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia), January 09, 2014, 5:47 PM.

To meet angels, there has to be the hands of 'sanjog' as ordained by Waheguru: "O Nanak, he alone meets the True Guru who has such union pre-ordained." How do I count my blessings? My good 'ardangni' Upkar Kaur, my life partner of 52 years as pre-ordained by 'sanjogs', a blessing that I did not fully deserve nor could recount and was yet rewarded by a lovely highly educated partner totally guileless, devoid of pretense, transparent, sincere, God fearing and honest to a fault, and with an unassuming demeanor. We were in due course blessed with four lovely daughters who picked all those qualities whch came with the milk and from the hand that rocked the cradle while reciting 'Sukhmani' that she knew by heart, They, in turn, were also blessed with equally wonderful spouses and eight brilliant grandchildren. This was our early heaven. Now the practical application: Very early on, I divested all minor decisions to my good wife. The brunt of bringing up, teaching good values by example and all other mundane affairs. While I basked in being the titular head nurturing a career, making the nest and of course making major decisions, such as - should we allow the current jathedar to have his way to keep out the elderly from gurdwara, especially those who need benches to sit. Or langar to be served only while sitting at the ground level. You are of course allowed to sit inside and download your mail on the cellphone. Should someone object, you could say that you were connected to Waheguru through the gurdwara WiFi. Here is an example of angels getting down to business. In 1979 I was posted to Ampar Tenang Estate as the first Asian Manager. This estate was a showcase and had rubber, oil palm, tea for crop, and a tea factory. The school for children was some 22 miles away and with morning and afternoon sessions, required six daily trips and some 132 miles a day. On the way to school there was this elderly Sardar ji who had a dairy farm that allowed the driver to pick up the daily supply of milk. On one occasion it happened my good wife was in the car and decided to get the milk and just exchange a word or two with the milkman's daughter-in-law. When asked for milk and seeing Upkar (my wife), the daughter-in-law blurted: "Bhen ji, don't take the milk today as we have already added water to it." We had a good laugh and I jokingly commented: "Budhu ko budhu melay kar kar lamba had" - "How one meets only one's own ilk!" In 1988 I retired but the milkman has kept supplying wholesome milk with minimal water added. Not long ago I saw Upkar arguing with the milkman over the monthly bill. The bill presented by the milkman was far less than what Upkar had recorded and gave him his rightful dues. On getting the money, the milkman tore away his copy saying: "Bhen ji, from now on whatever you pay would be the right amount." On occasions when Upkar would decide to go overseas the brunt of the recording would fall on me and I would be mostly remiss in this minor role. On Upkar's return I would be soundly rebuked that she will now pay him for the whole month regardless of the day he might have missed. This was the kind of education the children received and if they turned out to be angels too, it wasn't their fault. Some more stories for another time.

15: Harinder Pal Singh  (Patiala, Punjab ), January 10, 2014, 11:24 AM.

Everyone laments the increasing lack of sensitivity in the human race today towards fellow beings. It's been happening for ages. Even Ghalib despaired "Bas kar dushwaar hai har kaam ka aasaan hona, aadmi ko bhi maessar nahi insaan hona" - ("We live in an age where everything seems such a task, one can't even afford to be a human being!"). Amidst all this pessimism, Dipa, you have not only managed to find angels but have so eloquently expressed it too. In fact goodness is around, you need to find it. Kudos for it. No doubt the value system instilled in you helped you to find those who have the ability to empathize with the pain of fellow beings. Am sure you must have played angel too, to many. Keep up your faith in goodness of people.

16: Sudeep (Bangalore, India), January 23, 2014, 2:45 PM.

It was nice reading the article and also to see how an effort has been made to remember and appreciate these good deeds. I just wanted to say a few things about the sixth angel mentioned in your article. I met Dr. Simran Gupta on a trek a couple of years ago in Sikkim. I still vividly remember how I met her and her kindness stood out straightaway. Since then she has been a constant pillar of support in my life. She is the first person I go to to share my joys and pains. And she shares both of them equally. And I am sure her other friends too would vouch for her kindness and generosity.

17: Parvati (Kolkata, India), February 12, 2014, 12:18 PM.

Yes, Simran is always like that. Her default mode is being nice to all around her. That's why I like her so much.

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